No kidding. Here I am, having people say to me "not long to go now..." and "hang in there..." and occasionally (though I haven't really used this phrase very often, yet) I say "get this baby out of me!!" - I plan to save that phrase for when I'm actually overdue, if I actually go overdue.
Baby's not due until the 21st of December. BUT my mother had all three of her children 1-2 weeks early. I believe genetics do play an influential part in this whole childbirth thing, so I have faith that our baby will be early. How early? Only time will tell.. I try not to feel anxious, I try not to "wait around".. but this past week has been such an emotional, mental and physical roller coaster that a part of me maybe just wants this baby out so I can hold him outside of my body, not inside.
His kicking and squirming have been more intense than ever. It is literally moving my belly back and forth, side to side, and some kicks are harder than others - which actually feel quite uncomfortable and sometimes very painful I have to stop whatever I'm doing.
The past two days, I have had problems with diarrhea. Sorry if this is too much information - but anything pregnancy and childbirth related has lost its private factor many blog posts, forums, websites, books and classes ago. Last night was particular bad, I got woken up at 4am firstly by the intense sudden kicking - and then the stomach discomfort, and then I sat on the toilet for 45 minutes, and then I tried to go back to sleep, no luck, was hungry, so I got up and cooked myself some Chicken Noodles, and ate my noodles and watched a TV show, then back to bed at 6am. That's 4am - 6am of NOT SLEEPING in the middle of the night. Then, I got woken up to go to church and I wasn't ready to wake up.. I was exhausted. But I got up anyway, felt miserable at church, emotional that I wasn't feeling too good, and cried a few times at church. Then, I ate Sri Lankan food for lunch and my stomach got all upset all over again.. and the cycle continues... why did I have that curry. Because I really wanted curry. I can't get enough of spicy food during my pregnancy. It's so bad, yet so good.
This week was also particularly bad with the hay fever and the warm weather. I was pretty sure I was going into labour on Friday. My belly has dropped and I felt pains down my pelvic area and my uterus felt like it was contracting. Obviously false alarm, otherwise this post would've been a "HE IS BORN!" post... and although I've had many Braxton Hicks in the past few months, this past week my Braxton Hicks "practice" contractions have been more intense than ever.
Notice the trending words... "more.... than ever"?
This week I also had a mid week emotional breakdown. It was one of those days when I've scheduled too much to do in one day. Bigggg mistake. I felt so overwhelmed by the list of chores and having people over for Bible Study the night before meant that the house was in a mess and I wasn't exactly feeling the fittest or the most mobile to get that tidy up done as quickly as I used to be able to. I drove to my sister in law's and picked up lots of baby stuff she was so kind to give me, and then went to the shops, and by the time I got home, I had to unload all that stuff from my car in the HEAT, all that stuff piled up at the front door, the HEAT made me all hot and bothered. Even though I turned the AC on, it was too late by then, I was already hot and bothered. The house was a mess, the stuff needed to be packed away, I was hot, I had a bad hay fever attack, I still had a list of chores to do, and EVERYTHING just fell apart right then and there.
I had a massive cry. I called hubby and said "Can you please come home.." while sobbing uncontrollably. Hubby had no idea what to do.. he listened and he told me to not think of everything all at once, just focus on one thing at a time. He calmed me down, and he also came home. What a precious man.
So this week, I plan to take it easy. No more scheduling things to do that "fill up my days". Who cares if I don't get much done during the day.. I'm on MATERNITY leave I am supposed to be resting and looking after myself. Because of all the social things I had this week, my swimming has been neglected. That is probably why I am feeling more sore than ever this week compared to previous weeks.
The final weeks are supposed to be the toughest.. hopefully this past week was my toughest and I don't have to go through that again.
(Oohhh.. give me a minute while my baby gives me one of his strong kicks...)
He is so strong and active :-)
I can't wait to hold him, and yet at the same time I want this time to last as long as possible, just these final moments when it's just hubby and I, and I get to sleep as much as I want...
A lot of mixed emotions at this stage of my pregnancy... and it is all beautiful, wonderful feelings I wouldn't trade for anything else in the world. Hubby and I are waiting, and we are anxiously waiting for our little bundle of joy to come into our lives and make us a real FAMILY.
Thank you God for this gift and we pray you keep both of us safe and pray for a smooth delivery of our baby MICAH SOLOMON PETERSON...